Things that felt sufficient long ago feel deficient now. Should one become stricter with oneself? It is frightening to reveal the things one owns to the world as they are, but one has no choice but to worry for the sake of completely having the lights shine upon oneself without leaning on anything.
CECI. Now that we have actually met you, it is surprising that your voice is that deep.
That’s right. Whether it’s a pictorial, singing, the stage, there have been many times where I had to play the loveable and cute role, so many people see me as womanly. However, while singing, I like the lower register parts and the feeling of a gender-neutral pictorial concept. Looking at that, there is a difference between my image and my real self. In the drama “Prime Minister and I,” I played the role of Nam Da Jung, and when she was a reporter, her easy-going personality is similar to my personality. I had a really comfortable time acting, and there were many viewers that said the role felt fresh, so I felt disappointed that those episodes didn’t last longer.
CECI. Have you become accustomed to the burden of being a protagonist?
I’m not at the stage where I can pull someone in. Kwon Sang Woo, Jang Geun Suk and Lee Bum Soo were all kind and considerate, so I received a lot of help from them whether we were filming or not. I relied on their experience and I learned little by little, with my own experience accumulating. I sympathized with the director’s words when he stated “Though there are few people who have both been a protagonist and have not been a protagonist, there is a definite difference.” I gained a little ability in seeing the flow of a drama as a protagonist. I felt many times that concentration is the most important thing. While I intended to deliver subtle difference in emotions to the viewers, I still don’t know how to do it. (Laughs) I need to study and train more.
CECI. Nam Da Jung’s love was a bit stifling. Did you sympathize with her?
Nam Da Jung is a mature character that is respectful in front of her love and will sacrifice herself. As for me, there are many parts about me that are still child-like.
CECI. Is being mature a good thing?
I’m not sure. Being mature allows one to learn many more things. Right now, I like being 25-26 than being 20. However, I am able to think like this because I am still young. However, what I am sure of is at that age, doing what you are able to do is the best and prettiest thing. Even if I’m the only one doing it, I am able to show off a pure image when it matches me the most many times, so now I am able to show a transformation of myself. Lately when I have been doing pictorials, I enjoy the mannish style. While I have shown a very lovely image of myself, I am not sure whether I am now drawn to the mannish style of if I have liked it all along.
CECI. We heard that the day after your drama finished filming, you had to film the music video for SNSD’s new song.
I didn’t have any time to recollect on the drama. When I return to SNSD, I feel like I am revealing my true appearance after I was hiding something. The members say that when the “Yoona-ism” comes out that I have really appeared. I end up messing with my unnies as if I was doing aegyo. When I do that, I have the feeling that I returned.
CECI. Among the interview questions we prepared, we wrote down “How do you spend your time after finishing a drama?” but that was a dumb question.
I have no choice but to laugh. It felt like I only had one day to rest before our comeback. I was very tired and the stress was piling up, and there were times that the fact that I am also a human was showing on my face and in my actions. Originally, I became annoyed when I was evaluated by my appearance or ability. Rather than complain like this and have no schedules, it’s better to have a lot, so I returned to my original thoughts and I have to work hard.
CECI. What kind of transformation did SNSD have this time?
It’s not the kind of transformation as “I Got A Boy” in which each member developed and matured. Personally, I hope we are able to show off the charms of SNSD that we did with “Genie” and “Hoot.”
CECI. SNSD is in their eighth year as a group, and that means a lot in Korea. You must remember a lot, right?
Of course. Lately, when I look at EXO, I think of the past. When we’re with EXO, we joke that we can’t mess with them as something big will happen as a result, but this was something that we also heard a lot at one time. Seeing that we swept many awards and our sales are outstanding, I think “We must have been like that.” Only after time has passed that I realized the size of the love that we received. I would be grateful if the future is like the present, all while feeling pride in oneself and respecting the other members.
CECI. Can you define this “Yoona-ism” we were talking about earlier?
Lately I have become too devoted to my emotional expressions, so it’s becoming a big problem. (Laughs) When I’m in a good mood, I’m very bubbly, but when I’m not in a good mood, I’m very cold. I am very affected by the weather or a song. I am very indecisive when it comes to ordering from a menu. I end up saying “Anything is fine,” so the other person might say “Should we eat pizza?” and then I think “I don’t want pizza…isn’t there anything else?” There are people with tempers that tell me not to eat, but how could I do such a difficult thing? There are times when I write down what I want to eat on a memo.
CECI. What do you hate the most? Is it “misunderstanding?” (Laughs)
It’s when there’s a little water left in the cup, I ask who drank it, but no one answers and when I go to drink it, there’s only one sip left for me! When I get my work done so that I can meet up with someone on time, but when the other person cancels or makes me wait, I get mad. Hm, however, more than that, I want to be more devoted to my emotions. (Laughs)
CECI. You don’t use SNS, so your fans might be hurt.
While filming this drama, I worried about whether I should be using SNS or not. I had fans from all over Asia, not just Korea, supporting me on the drama set, so I wanted to convey my thanks. However, I don’t have the conviction to use it. I worry about making a mistake. Right now, I’m satisfied appearing through the official home page or other members’ SNS. I hope the fans understand.
CECI. You landed in the middle of your 20s at the age of 25. Have you been living well?
It’s half of 50. (Laughs) As I don’t have any huge regrets, it feels like I have been living well. Compared to what I have now, I would be assessed of having good luck, but now the time for me to be assessed has come now. In SNSD, you could say I have 60 shades of light, but when I’m with my members, it looks like I have 100, but now it’s just 60. I have to mature and improve. Right now is a time where I am realistically looking upon myself.
CECI. Aren’t you harsher when you look at yourself?
That’s a possibility. What I thought was “okay” back in the day feels “lacking” today. I broke that generosity towards myself after finishing “Love Rain.” I realized that I was conceited and my first slump came. As much as that time hurt when I felt many things, I felt like I had advanced a step. I started putting in more effort and worrying a lot more. I worry about my personality as I plan for things but don’t put them into practice well. That’s it! That’s why I don’t use SNS! I might be too truthful! (Laughs)
CECI. When was your turning point?
I was 20 when we promoted “Gee.” Before that, I appeared in “You Are My Destiny,” and that was my heyday. (Laughs) My second turning point is wanting to display a new side of me in “Prime Minister and I.” As this is the Year of the Horse, I am hoping that I continue with good energy.
CECI. What do you want to do the most in the spring of 2014?
If I exercise, I hope I do it correctly. (Laughs) Ah! I want to watch many movies, too. During the Lunar Year, so as to not fall behind the trends, I watched “Frozen.” The majority of my friends had already seen it, and I only found one friend who hadn’t seen it, so we went to watch it in the middle of the night. It had been a long time since I went to the theater, so it was a very good experience. There are still many more movies that I want to watch. First, there’s “About Time.” I have always liked romantic movies.
Translation: The Real CZ @ Hallyu Interview